'MY SISTER THINKS I'M SATAN' - Acrylic, Spray Paint, Oil Stick, Pumice on Canvas

Artist Statement

I have always been fascinated by the psychological patterns born out of experience. This was especially so after living with PTSD for many years. The tendrils of sexuality, early brain development, parental influence, abuse, environment, culture, religion, poverty, and stress are just some of the intricate complexities that constitute these patterns of behavior.

My paintings are the abstraction of this. I can't escape my own desire for renewed perspective, and so I mostly paint personal episodes of discovery, integration, and growth.

Roberto Matta told Gorky, “Why don’t you take a clean canvas and just paint what you see or feel on that canvas without too much forethought . . . don’t work on it, let it happen to you.” Because of the traumatic times we live in, we as impressionable human "canvases", have become the epitome of this quote. We are being imprinted faster than we can process and without forethought new behavioral patterns are embedded.

“Don’t work on it, let it happen to you.” also describes how I approach a painting. The process is gestural, intuitive, and emotional. I experience an interplay between spontaneity and non-judgmental observation as I paint, knowing the entangled components will reveal the metaphoric pattern of the moment. The title will eventually float into awareness hinting at the meaning.

I don’t think there is a way to avoid the confluence of psychological patterns unconsciously arranged by our minds, in any given moment, creating the lens through which we view our reality. I feel it is important to elicit curiosity. To cause a questioning of how one uses self-awareness. My goal is to paint the whole of it. To mirror a moment of becoming